Mom Is My Emergency Contact Podcast

Too Crazy To Be True Series: We Were Both Dating The Same Man Part 2

• Lisa • Season 2 • Episode 4

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Part 2 is HERE! 

We walk through the moment of impact, the uneasy drive to meet face-to-face, and the gut-drop as more women surface, including one who had lived with him for two years! Listen to Lori and Stephanie navigate through this incredible story that ended with an amazing friendship.


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Lisa


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SPEAKER_02:

I put his name and I put a red flag and then I met Stephanie.

SPEAKER_00:

Dun dun dun. So Stephanie reaches out to you, Lori, and what does she say?

SPEAKER_02:

So an hour later, an hour after I decide to put it out there, I get a message from this woman and said, Hi. My name is Stephanie. And I've been dating this guy for five years. My god. And are you sure this is the same guy? And uh I don't know why. I just I gave her my phone number, so call me. And we didn't know each other from Adam. And I said, uh, I've been dating him for four years.

SPEAKER_03:

Where do you live? And ends up she lives on the same side of town I do. And I said, uh, hey, I don't know you, but why don't you come over to my house? I laughed. We both afterwards we now, you know, we both we both hung up and gone, what the hell? We just like reached out randomly.

SPEAKER_00:

So before we go further, Stephanie, this whole time, you know, you're just dating him. You know, he brought you in the second time, and you're dating exclusively. And when you saw his photo and Lori posted, what were your thoughts?

SPEAKER_03:

I I was in complete and total shock. Um, I couldn't believe what I was seeing, and um my daughter, um, she was a young adult, and she, you know, I I uh I screamed for her. And she comes running down the stairs she thinks the way I screamed and the way I was crying and reacting, she actually thought my mom had died.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03:

And um I just I I really don't have the words to describe how I felt. I just felt so betrayed. I shocked pure, pure shock. So, you know, I immediately messaged Lori because what the hell? Like, who are you? How do you know him? You know, in the picture, like I knew that picture. So I was just on pens and needles waiting for her to respond to me, and like she said, she gave me her number. I called her and she invited me over. And I said, Okay, let me change my clothes, and I'm on my way.

SPEAKER_02:

Right.

SPEAKER_03:

And the crazy thing about this is I still wasn't even really believing this was real. My mind was thinking, this is his ex-wife. She has, you know, knows who I am. She's messing with me. And am I walking into something crazy?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

But I was like, oh well, fuck it. I'm going, you know.

SPEAKER_00:

Um did you at any point like contact him before you went to meet up with Lori? Nope. Nope.

SPEAKER_03:

Because what I wanted to do is I wanted me and her to go to his house and show up together.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay.

SPEAKER_03:

And uh, she didn't think that was a good idea. Um, because he has um a lot of security cameras all over the outside and inside of his home. Um a lot. He loves guns, so he has so many guns in his home.

SPEAKER_00:

Um so it probably not the best idea. Um, I'm glad Lori talked you out of that one. So as as everyone's listening, you are probably at the point where you're like, okay, this is one man dating these two women, and they find out that, oh my God, he's definitely dating another woman and not just me. And we're not talking like a month, uh couple weeks or a month. We're talking years. Years. Okay. Um, so if we can just talk about when you guys first met, how did that feel? And either of you can comment on that.

SPEAKER_02:

It was when she came over, and we're still in shock.

SPEAKER_03:

Shock. I mean, I can't explain it because it's it's that your world just gets turned upside down in a matter of a second, and you don't I don't know how to comprehend it. I couldn't comprehend what was going on. She couldn't comprehend. Within 24 hours, I caught him with another woman in a restaurant. I find another woman reaches out to me and says she's been dating him five years. He, I have no idea how long he's been he's been dating Barbie because he says he's been sick, and I'm like going, I don't I don't know how long you've been sick. I mean, sometimes you're sick, sometimes you're not. I mean, look, mind you, I even took him to several of his doctor's appointments. So what was the sickness he had?

SPEAKER_00:

Cocaine. But what did he like? What were these? Were these when you took him to the doctor's office, did he actually go inside?

SPEAKER_03:

Oh yeah. No, he did have a few um issues, but he had um, he was diabetic. Um who wasn't after 50? Had a thyroid issue, you know, so it was kind of like normal stuff, but his sickness was um, you know, supposedly he had long COVID. So that just affected his heart. It made, it exasperated all of his medical conditions that he had. They could never find the right medications, you know, and everything was just making him sick all the time. It was because the medicine went down his throat and not up his nose.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah. So, okay, so there was that that illness situation. How old were his children?

SPEAKER_03:

He has two daughters with his ex-wife. Um, both of them at the time, when I started dating him, his youngest had just turned 13. So the other one was what, 15? 14, 15, and then his ex-wife had um has a daughter from a previous marriage, but grew up in the house with them. But he had 50-50 custody of both of his his daughters.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay, so they were teenagers. They weren't, these were not little kids. No, right. Okay. All right, so all right, let's fast forward to this. So you're you're meeting, you're now like, okay, I know it's you, and not only it's the two of you, there's a third woman, Barbie, as you mentioned, that uh, you know, she's dating him as well, and I don't know what the hell she's thinking at this point either.

SPEAKER_03:

But so Well, I really wouldn't insult Barbie, but nevertheless, um, so we're sitting here, we're sitting there outside on my patio looking, because I'm going first, she she's like, I'm gonna try to call him. And I remember in my mind going, oh good, she's gonna call, and it's gonna be a different guy with a different name. And this will be just a mistake. And he doesn't answer, it goes straight to his voicemail, and my heart sank. Oh god, how does she have his phone number? Just in a matter of the couple hours that she and I are talking, we're sitting there comparing notes. That son of a bitch, all these he had been, he would text her and text and copy and paste and send us the same text. We had the same pictures where he would say, I'm out on the field. Here's a picture of me out on the field, uh down in the mines. And I went, Well, I have that picture too. What time did you get that? What's the time I got that? And Western are going, you gotta be shitting me. He's sending us the same text every day. I do want to say one thing, a couple of things. When I met Lori, I never, you know how some women want to blame the other woman. I never for a moment felt any hatred, any anger, any ill feelings towards her whatsoever, because she was a victim as I was. You know, it's not like she knew about me or I knew about her. You know, we were both innocent victims in this situation. So I never ever had any ill feelings towards her whatsoever. Um, but I'll tell you what we did that night after I called him and he denied, he did not answer my call. I said, Lori, let's take a picture together and let's shoot the bird. So me and her take a picture, flipping off the camera, and I sent it to him, and I said, I am in shock, you piece of shit. Um, and he never responded. He only just got caught with the other woman. I caught her with her, and now, and I'm sure he's probably going, How the hell did these two exactly my days of getting worse?

SPEAKER_02:

But the story continues.

SPEAKER_03:

Two days later, I get another message from woman number four. I'm hi.

SPEAKER_02:

I saw your post. I've been dating him for two years and living with him.

SPEAKER_03:

I found out, and I apologize, she did not see my post. The other one, I guess, reached out and said, There is this woman claiming to have been dating. Hang on, wait, hang on. Oh, I'm sorry. You're missing a point. Oh, you're missing a part. Oh, sorry, my friend. So after I yeah, go ahead. Yeah, after we found all this out, I said, I need to get in touch with his ex-wife. Yes. Now I was very nervous because of all the things he had told me about her for five years, right? But I was like, what the hell? I'm gonna reach out to her. And so I did, and she was just this very sweet, um, nothing like I expected, you know. She said she had no clue who I was. I said, what about the emails and and everything you sent to me?

unknown:

Oh, God.

SPEAKER_03:

She said, Where was the email? What did the email, you know, who was the email from? And I said, Well, it was because she used to work for him. So it was her work email. And he said, and she told me, she said, I've not had access access to that email for many, many years. So that motherfucker sent that did sent this email to He did it. He he made it look like it was from his ex to me. And she said, Stephanie, I I never knew you existed. She said, the only person I ever knew about, and she told me this lady's name and sent me a screenshot of her um Facebook page. That's the one I caught him with. Oh, the the one that number four. Mm-hmm. Oh, okay. And and she also told me she knew uh, she said there were two women she knew about. She gave me their names. So come to find out, the other lady's name she gave me, he was dating her for a year. So when I met him, he was in a relationship with her.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh my God.

SPEAKER_03:

It just got worse and worse. It was like, what kind of fucking nightmare am I living in?

SPEAKER_00:

And how the hell did he pull this off? It's a lot of work. I mean, that's probably why he wasn't feeling good. That's a that's a that's a second, third, fourth, fifth job, you know? Yeah. I mean, that takes a lot of energy to create that email, and and that is so calculated and so fucked up, to be honest with you. Um so long story short, Lori and Stephanie became besties throughout this entire situation. And I know there was there's a lot more that happened in between, you know, now and then. Um so obviously you spoke to this the the ex-wife. She's not as a like a monster, like they always say she like that's a red flag in itself, okay? They they talk so badly about their ex-wife, and then I mean I've experienced that, and then I met them, and I'm like, oh my God, she's this nice, sweet woman. Who are they talking about? Yeah. Um, so besides the ex-wife sharing those uh other women, did any other women pop out? You know, pop up.

SPEAKER_03:

There was the other woman. So a couple of days after I met Stephanie, another woman calls me. And and I I went, oh my god, Stephanie, there's another one. And we're like, dear God, they're just, you know, they're they're coming out of the bushes. And this is the woman that had been not only dating him for two years, but living with him. Now, mind you, something that she had said earlier. Every other weekend he had his daughters. Okay. So the weekends he wasn't with his daughters. Some weekends I would I would have the opportunity to spend time with him. If it wasn't me, probably it was with her, whatnot. But when the woman he was living with wasn't there or staying with her family or grandchildren or whatnot. I was Monday night. She was Tuesday night. I did see women's stuff there, yes. I asked questions. It was always his daughters. I didn't know his daughters to know that they weren't. And I used to say, why's your daughter's, you know, shower sprinchy in your bathroom? Oh, because my daughter doesn't like using that shower. She likes this one. We got a new shower head. She likes using this, you know, to help them get ready in the mornings, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, uh, okay, you know, I I know there were, you know, at the time I lived in a in a small, you know, uh a townhouse, and I had to share a bathroom with my son because we only had one bathroom uh townhouse. It just and it wasn't like the lies were bad. It was the lies were so good, so consistent, and so logically made sense. And you have to understand we're not stupid women. She has an amazing job working in the veterinarian field. I my job is to work, I work in vendor management to look for red flags on contracts. You know, my whole life is dedicated to red flags and compliance and risk. I mean, I'm not the village idiot. I mean, you're not the village idiot. I don't, I don't think so. None of us were village idiots on this. Some of them I think they might have known some more than others, but that's not my, that's not my that's neither here nor there. The problem is, is that we really we were asking questions. We were just getting really good answers. He's not stupid. And he was fast with his answers. Yes. Matter of fact, it wasn't like, um, um, it it was just, it would just come right away. And then he would turn it around and make us feel guilty asking, listen, I got my daughters to take care of. I'm not feeling good. You know I own my own business, you know, and that and I keep saying, I'm I'm circling a drain. I'm because you're a pillow to post. You know, I'm always out on the field. You know, I can't take calls when I'm out on the field. You know I'm working 12 hours sometimes. And I just I can't take a call. It would, it's it's a detriment to my job to bring my phone and take phone calls.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. Sure.

SPEAKER_03:

And and I know a lot of people may think like he had somebody living with him. How did you not know that? Because he would take her stuff and hide it. Yes. He would take it. He had the main closet. He had a second closet that no one had, and he had locks on a lot of things in cameras. Now, I would feel guilty if I would walk around snooping in his place because he was. Now I know why there were cameras everywhere. But you know, he was set and he told us he did that because he had to protect himself against the sex. Of course. Of course. The crazy thing is. What he would do is he would take all of this woman's stuff and hide it. Yeah. Yeah. And hide it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

Well, you know, uh first of all, I didn't bring you on here for for people to say, oh, how could they? Because, you know, you like and I think Lori and I were talking about how this happens to very strong, uh, successful, intelligent women. You know, and it's always like, how the hell I mean, I I have a master's degree degree in psychology. How did this happen to me? They're good. They're really good at what they do. They like I always say, Oscar-winning performance. Oh, yes. It's an Oscar-winning performance. It's from the wrong field. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, the, you know, the red flags that we I want to talk about them. So because I want the listeners to hear this. Um, you know, the gaslighting. I think that anytime that you ask a question and it's a logical question, why are you why is that bad? Like I always remember in my situations, you know, when you ask a question, it's so simple. And then you're getting yelled, I'm like, why is that bad? Like that in itself is like is a red flag, right? And then the never posting on social media, I'm gonna say red flag, red flag, red flag. I don't care. You know, if you're with somebody and you're in an exclusive relationship and you've been dating for four to five fucking years, and you're not posting them on social media, um, something's up. And I, you know, I gotta say, there's a reason for that. They're they're hiding you, obviously, you know. Um, you know, the other thing um is I'm working and um don't do you don't know that? I don't can't you you know, again, that gaslighting, you know, situation. Um I wanted to ask the both of you, did you ever at any time want to do uh or ever did um a background check on him? I did. Oh. I did. Background check came clean. And that's and that's the bad part of the background check because you're not gonna unless it's a criminal record, you're not gonna f you know, unl unless they were arrested. But there's nothing that says narcissism and psychological liar on there.

SPEAKER_03:

He did have an issue. And and the funny thing is, is when I first started seeing him, I don't know if he had did this with you as well, it was before I had a chance to bring it up. He had said, listen, if you ever do a background check on me, you're going to see I was arrested several months ago. My ex-wife pushed me and I was trying to protect myself, and she called the sheriffs on me and had me arrested. I have had, I had it, what do you call when you had it uh expunged? He had it expunged from his record, but he says, and here's the paperwork to show you that it was expunged, that she see what a horrible person she is. So he brought it up before I had a chance to ask. So I'm sitting there thinking I appreciated him being honest. So I why would I bring it up any further? He doesn't have, he didn't have this. Mind you, I wanted to say it's very, very important. This guy was not this six-foot beautiful striking man. You don't see him and go, oh my own, what am I doing? You know, and dropping my britches. Oh, I'm just a sweet little nerdy, you know, engineering kind of a guy. I'm just, I've had a really bad relationship. I don't know how to date.

SPEAKER_00:

Like a toxicity comes in different sizes.

SPEAKER_03:

It doesn't make a difference. Approach a pro to pro. Yeah, exactly. You know, I'll tell you this one thing too. Um, my kids absolutely adored him to the point where when it was especially my youngest daughter, she would say, Hey mom, are you gonna see him this weekend? And I'd say yes, and she'd say, I want to go with you. They loved him for a very long time.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

And and mind you, I can go on and on about yes, I see the reflex. My for me, my mother used to, God rest her soul, Lori, you when you are in a relationship when someone is loves you and treats you well, you're going to know he's not treating you right. And I would be like, you don't know him, you don't know him. But mind you, while this whole thing that while Seffi and I and all got started, the relationship that we knew was bad enough. What we went through and ignoring the red flags was bad enough, the healing got worse because the stories started to come out. And comparing notes and telling stories and comparing where he was with Stephanie, myself, the other woman that I caught him with, the other woman that he was living with, he was a very sick, manipulative, evil man that was doing horrible things to us behind our backs. And that was the hard part of the healing. It wasn't like we we knew he wasn't treating us like the queens that we should have been. It was bad enough to know he was doing this stuff for fun, knowing what he was doing, manipulating all of us for his pleasure, that he is a drug addict, that he doesn't have these diseases that he did, and that he not only brought us in, he brought our children all in, he he has a lot of deviances that we didn't realize until we all got together. When we all started putting the puzzle pieces together, we had to heal from five years, four years, two years, another two years, who knows how long, of being with someone that we we all saw separate pieces of him because he would mirror he started our relationships by playing a part that he knew we wanted. He was totally different with me, yes, than he was with Lori. Yes, totally different. Of course, he knew our weaknesses, and then he would play his weaknesses that we would fall in love with him, and then he would manipulate the relationship to get us attached based on he knew what our weaknesses were.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, of course. You know, it's some of the things that you said where you're like he's he was just like me. He was that's mirroring. That is definitely a mirroring tactic and making you think that you guys have this amazing chemistry, you all have this amazing, um, have this same uh values and all that. And it feels for a woman, and it feels good. It feels like, oh my God, I met my person. He's just like me. He thinks like me, he likes to do the same things I want to do. That's there's no fault to anybody, to anybody feeling that way. We're told that we should be going with someone that we have similarities to, and we're feeling that way. So, you know, that there's no fault to anybody falling for that. You know, he's the one who did the bad thing, not you know, you were just falling in love with a man that was being kind to you and loving, and um, you had things, you know, you should family um uh events and gatherings, and that there's nothing wrong with women doing that. Um, I want you both to know that that, you know, this is uh common thing that I personally think that I think not that toxicity was never around in the 1800s, because I'm sure they were, um, but I think that the dating apps makes it easier for narcissistic and manipulative men. And that's the problem with the apps. That's the problem because they are having, my God, it's a menu for them. Yeah, you know, they're going on different sites with different pictures, and some don't even post. Yeah, they absolutely they're like, holy shit, I hit the gold mine here. You know, meanwhile, we're thinking, you know, like you, Lori, you know, I was said that they did the same thing to me, like, hey, go on. I'm like, no, I don't want to, you know, yeah, come on. And then I was like, yeah, that wasn't for me. So, you know, it I I want to just ask you a couple of questions before we kind of like wrap things up. Um, what would you do differently? Like knowing what you know now and going into if you decide to go into the dating world or not, what would you do differently? You would have started.

SPEAKER_03:

Um it's so it's funny that um, you know, I used to hear people talk about their healing journey, and I really couldn't relate to that. Um, I've done so much healing. Lori has done so much healing. I'm extremely proud of us. Um what I would do differently, um, you know, honestly, I'm not sure there is much any anything I would do different because I um am a very trusting person to a fault. Um I'm just you know, I'm just a good old southern girl originally from Mississippi. So, you know, where people are respectful, um, have good morals and values, and um I I don't think I don't think I would have done anything differently, but I will say I'm a different person now. So, you know, there's different places you can go and you hear other women telling like these different stories, and I'm like, oh my god, girl, are you stupid? Like, you need to get rid of this person. Do you know what I mean? It's like I can see these, I it's hard to explain.

SPEAKER_00:

It's easier when it's easier to be outside of it, and that's why I always tell people that you cannot form this negative opinion on these women. They are you're in a loving relationship, you're in love. Why would he lie? Why would he do? You're not thinking in your head, anybody in their freaking right mind would create this freaking scenario that's false, uh, uh another life that's false. You would never think that, you know? So it's easier for someone to be on the outside and be like, oh my god, you didn't, and you uh because why would someone do that? You're not you're not taught that that someone that you are in a loving relationship has the capacity to have triple life, you know, in the in this situation, I don't know how many other women.

SPEAKER_03:

I just wouldn't have thought it was ever going to be like this. Of course. And I'll tell you this did I make a lot of mistakes in staying with him as long as I did? Hell yes. But you have to understand, first and foremost, when it's that kind of a relationship, you get addicted to the relationship. I would get, when I knew I was gonna see him, I would be so excited. Yeah. The day I would leave, I would be in tears for days because I didn't know what I was supposed to see him again. He knew what he was doing. Of course. The worst part for me was after this had happened. It took a health toll on me beyond comprehension. And I'm gonna be flat out honest on this because that's my person purpose of us being here. And your story. And this is our story. I had a heart attack a month later from the stress. But whether you're religious or not, I'm not a religious person, but it was one of those things that God had said, I've had enough. No more, no more for you guys. It's done. The damage is done, it's time for you guys to move on, it's time to heal. And not only are you gonna heal, but I'm gonna give you the best person in the world to heal with. And about a month after all this has happened, I needed a break. I needed some time off from work, and I called Stephanie. I said, let's take a girl's weekend, let's go up to Orlando for about four days. I rented this, you know, like super nice, super nice hotel resort. Yeah. We're sitting here thinking, okay, we're gonna go out, we're gonna go drinking, blah, blah, blah. We bring clothes. I don't think we got out of our pajamas for four days. We bought all these bottles of wine and sat in that hotel room and balled our eyes out together for four days. And we barely knew each other at this point. Yes. Barely knew each other. And I knew that I had just met my best friend. Same. So God said, You don't need that son of a bitch. But I want to introduce you to your soulmate, and she's gonna be your best friend. Yeah, and not only that, but we have also every day we still talk to his ex-wife. Yeah. Love her. Yeah. She was tortured beyond anything that she and I went through. She was married to the son of a bitch. And the stories and the torture he still tries to put through to her is heartbreaking to the point that he has accused his daughters against his their mother to because he's that manipulative. And we're here to tell you not to sit there, poor us. Don't feel sorry for us. I mean, we're doing fancy. Trust me, we have been nothing but healing. And I'll tell you though, we didn't rush the healing process. We didn't put ourselves back out there to date. We didn't uh do anything until we knew. But it takes time. We had a lot of setbacks and do well and laughing. But we really did the work. We really did the work. Truly. Do you realize we have taught every single day since the day this happened? Wow. Every single day. Even when we go out of time, the other day she left, I was like, please don't forget to talk to me today. I'm gonna be lonely. I really talked. But that's what you have to find. You have to find that and your safe place and the therapy and and the friendships. And we're telling this story because nobody believes this crazy ass story. It is the most insane, and we laugh now. And and trust me, he's he's he's so he's not worth an ounce of tears. But we we we keep seeing these women, young women, older women, still putting out there. I can't tell if he loves me. I think he's seeing someone else. Should I stay? I found out he's seeing someone else. And I'm like, Steffi, we've got to let people know. If you have to question if this is a relationship, it is not a relationship. Right. If you question anything, a man, if he loves you, will not, you're not gonna question anything. And my mom, before she died, she told me, she said, Lori, do me this one thing. Go listen to the song When a Man Loves a Woman and listen to the lyrics. That is how a man is supposed to treat you. And if he's not, he doesn't love you and it's not a relationship.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah. And we had to find out the hard way. Right. But I mean, at the end of the day, you guys have this amazing friendship, amazing relationship. I mean, as terrible as all the things that you've been through, um, both of you, you found each other. And that is a wonderful thing. And not everyone gets to have that happy ending, right? Yes. Um, but you know, Lori, the thing and and Stephanie, the thing is that you guys are one of thousands. Yes. You're not alone. Yeah. And I'm saying this because I want you to both know that you're not alone, that there's many women that have gone through this, many women before you, many women that are going through it uh right now. And um, but at the end of the day, you know, you are survivors. You survived through this, you're thriving through this, and sharing your story and healing. You know, I I love the fact that you talked about your healing process and it wasn't easy, it was hard. Um, but you both did not do anything wrong. You did exactly what our hearts tell us. We fall in love. Never in our wildest dream would we think that this person is abusing, emotionally abusive, and using us for their own entertainment. Nobody thinks that. It's hard to comprehend.

SPEAKER_03:

It's like watching those murder mystery shows, and you sit there and you go, how in the world could he do something like that? And it's because you're thinking you're and I remember telling myself one time, because you're thinking rationally why someone would do that. They're not rational people, and they're not the same people as we are, right? And it's hard to comprehend that someone could be that evil.

SPEAKER_00:

I'm evil, you're evil. Is and how is it happening to me? So, you know, the thing is it can happen to anybody. Yes, hopefully it doesn't, you know, hopefully it doesn't, and I don't want to sound so um, you know, negative, but you gotta get your you have to get your guard up. If you're doing the dating, even online or not online, you have to do the homework, you gotta do the background, you got to really know somebody. And at any point you question, why are you doing that? And they make you feel bad, that's the red flag, and all you need is that red flag. Lori and Stephanie, thank you so much for being a part of this show, and thank you for wanting to tell your story to warn other women that you know it can happen to the best of us, and that you are still able to see the other side and going through it because you've healed and they're not alone and they're gonna be okay.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, that, you know, if if we had to go through what we had to go through, for one, and on our story, I was able to meet my best friend. And then even with with his ex, the three of us, I met the friends I didn't know I needed. And got rid of the person I didn't need. But she and I had talked so much about how it broke our heart to see other women that think they're alone and that they feel embarrassed, they feel ashamed. Don't. It's we've all been there. Honey, I was in my 50s when I found this. I wasn't in my twenties. No. It doesn't make a difference how old they are, how wealthy they are, how good looking they are. They're out there. And you're not alone. And the best thing I can it's survive. You're gonna survive. If we could survive what we went through, it's survivable. And who we are today is nowhere where we were last year at this time. And we have become such. I I just I love the person I've become. I didn't think I was ever going to get here. Yeah. And I love the person she's become. Yeah. And I'm so proud of us. And we've accomplished things we never thought we would ever do. We have jumped outside of our comfort zones. We're going to next month with my my bestie. You know, I finally have found the strength to put myself back out there and go on a date. And I I love it. I'm very proud of myself. Um, I uh I mean, obviously super proud of you as well, but just for me personally, I've healed so damn much that I don't even want a man. I don't want, I don't. I am so happy and content having my own space to do what I want. Um I'm I'm like truly the happiest I've ever been. I always thought I needed the man. You know, I always thought I needed this man to help me and do all these things, and you don't. No. You know, and I am I am so content being by myself and having my peace and I'm loving my life.

SPEAKER_00:

I love that. I love that for both of you. And it's and you know, I just want to say that there's nothing wrong with wanting to date and there's nothing wrong with being content, just being on your own, you know? Yeah. Um, but I want to thank you both again so much for being here and for spending time with me um and sharing your story so honestly. So if this episode resonated with you, please don't forget to subscribe to our YouTube channel at Mom Is My Emergency Contact. And make sure you're subscribed to the podcast on all platforms where you listen to podcasts. Just search for Mom is My Emergency Contact Podcast. Reviews really help this show to you know reaching more women. So if you have a moment, please consider leaving a review. And if you feel like you have a story that belongs in our lifetime movie segment, we want to hear from you. Please email us at mom is my emergency contact at gmail.com. All one word. All links mentioned in today's episode can be found in the episode notes. And again, Lori, Stephanie, thank you so, so much for sharing your story.

SPEAKER_03:

Thank you so much for giving us that opportunity.

SPEAKER_00:

Yes, we love sharing our story to help others. Thank you. Okay, and until next time, take care and bye.